The magic of our inner gifts and talents becomes lost when we focus on swimming against the currents of our inner being. It seems so much easier to grab onto something known than it is to consider the parts of ourselves that we have not discovered. It is easier to assume the roles that are handed out in our social environment than it is to fight for our uniqueness and the right to defend that.

The boxes in life

Our own individual gifts often end up being suppressed when we attempt to match them up to a particular standard. It is when a person begins praising a common external goal as the benchmark for success and usefulness that the sense of uniqueness gets compromised.

Back at the beginning of 2008 I was taking a short class on how people change their behaviour according to whether a person's face appears more hostile or friendlier instead. The factor that determines this is subconscious for the most part — we compare faces to people that we have encountered in the past and make a judgement as to the behaviour to expect from people with certain facial attributes.

On The Face of The Matter

In retrospect I remember a few people telling me in the past that I look like a certain actor, and that makes me think about how often we make those claims about others: "the one that looks like…" or "he looks like… this situation looks like… etc."

"This object is LIKE that one" is so much more comfortable and easier than investigating the true nature of "that object".

Don't get me wrong. I do think that these comparisons are useful, but I think that when we use them on people and attempt to compare each other to some ideal then these comparisons become pathological.

No attack is too well-informed

The problem becomes obvious when a person begins comparing themselves and making statements such as "I want to be like him". The cause of conflict can often be pinned down to the expectations a person places on themselves or others to meet an ideal criteria. Perceived leaders in our world tend to set the benchmark for others to strive towards. I think that process of comparison is often detrimental to the unique gifts each individual holds within.

The source of a number of hostile attitudes tends to be that a certain group of a different culture or religion does not match our own. But those hostile attitudes seem to just reach for the best outcome or the best ideal — the best religion or the best culture. If someone falls short of reaching the perceived ideal state then others tend to meet that person with aggression.

So at this point the question arises: how can we discover our own inner gifts and share them with others while having this competition-based mindset?

Suspend Judgement

The bottom line is: You Can't. Not while this environment of competition exists.

If others are expecting me to choose the best "box" or to meet some standard then it becomes difficult for them to experience something I might have to offer outside of those expectations. If I also hold on to those expectations then I suppress the inner potential I have to experience something new.

To discover what others have to offer and what we have to offer we first have to suspend judgement and instead of attempting to mimic a standard allow our own inner gifts and the gifts that others have to offer to be present. It is in state of sharing mutual consciousness that it becomes possible to bring forward our true potential.